Caller ID

I know who you are.

I know what you’re calling for.

I won’t answer the phone.

because I got nothin’.

You want money?

Get in line.

My pockets are empty

until the 15th

and most of that is already accounted for.

 

Yes, I know you’d like

your paper edited today

because you just finished it

and it’s due tomorrow morning,

But I have a lot of stuff to grade

you know, for work.

My friend needs a resume,

My editor keeps calling

Oh and these two little girls

who are always running around me?

They need my attention once in a while.

You want my mind?

Get in line

But for now,

I think it needs

a worry-free vacation

–it’s never had one.

 

I know who you are

and I know why you’re calling.

I’m not answering

because I”m tired of explaining to you

–and the others

that the cancer

and my psychopathic ex

sucked every sexual impulse

out of me.

You want my body?

Get in line.

If I ever get the slightest inclination back,

I might call you.

 

I know you prayed for me

while I was sick

It was important to you

and I appreciate it so much.

In fact, it probably worked

but I don’t think I need

organized religion –again.

I’m not anti-God

I’m just anti-pigeon-holing.

My spirit is a little freer than that.

You want my soul?

Get in line.

But I gotta tell you,

I”m all tapped out.

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