As I reflect over the past year and look forward to the coming one, there is one very strong concept that I have learned. It’s about creating. What we create with our words and our thoughts. I had ideas and plans and dreams that I’ve held onto throughout my life. And I didn’t settle. I realized that I would rather have nothing then settle for something. I would rather be alone than be with someone that I wasn’t 100% sure about. It sounds extreme, I know.
Here’s the thing though, we all create our realities, consciously or unconsciously. Everything I have, was created by me, through words, intentions, even effort. I believe the same goes for everyone. There is no luck involved. I do not believe in luck. A higher power or powers, possibly. but it still is in direct response to our intentions and beliefs.
There are three main things I have wanted throughout this life: I wanted someone to grow old with, who would be committed to me and love me, someone I would never want a “break” from. I have also wanted a baby. Just one would be fine, but I wanted the pregnancy, I wanted the whole package, though, I did look into adoption for several years. Sounds simple enough, but as you may have already read, I was marked at 15 unable to have children. And it was true, I was in a few relationships for years and never used any birth control. Nothing. And my ultimate career goal was to teach English in College.
Today, I have the most amazing husband who far surpasses whatever I could have asked for. I am weeks from delivering our child after being through a perfectly healthy and textbook pregnancy. And I teach English at Case Western Reserve University –Not just any college. Can you imagine? Patience, and intent, I believe are the keys.
In my 37 years, I have had a lot of life-transforming experiences. I needed this complete education before I could truly appreciate all that I have now. I have lived in a third-world country, I have visited several continents, I have dated many men (only one American) and I have held several interesting and distinct positions, from radio news announcer, to pre-school teacher, to Peace Corps Volunteer, to social worker. This education has been so good for me, and I’m appreciative of it all. But I also realize how all of these steps, good and bad have lead me to this glorious palace I have been building and am continuing to build.